Decisions

Today is one of those days. At least, it has started off that way. I woke up from a weird dream to reading comments and opinions about Pj’s and my move to Ohio. I don’t think people understand that I feel peace about this. It’s weird, yes. Very weird, in fact, because I used to get furiously angry at people when they’d suggest we move to Ohio. The simple thought of it made me so irritated I’d have to leave the room.

Now, for some reason beyond my understanding, I don’t get mad and I don’t get frustrated. Perhaps, I just needed time for the desire to be brought up in me. I do actually want to move to Ohio. I have for a little while now but didn’t want to tell my husband because it might have been a false sense of hope. He loves Ohio and rightly so, his family live there. I understand that completely. But, we are not moving to Ohio for that reason. Mind you, we wouldn’t move to that part of Ohio if his family didn’t live there, but we will have our own individual lives to assume once we settle in. After all, we have a baby on the way and I’m not going to entertain guests 24/7 just because they live nearby. I have my own identity, I enjoy my own personal space at times, most times, in fact, and I want to create a life there that is specific to me. I’ll be the same Sherri in Ohio as in Kentucky, still wanting my time alone, still wanting to keep my house clean, still wanting to do the same things I do here, just in Ohio. A different surrounding, new opportunities, but still the same me.

Two of my first priorities are church and baby doctor. I’m not sure if I mentioned this yesterday but church is my main goal. I want to find a church that we both know we should be planted in and one that will feed our spirits. I’m not about to rid myself of my church life just because we change location. I’ve been looking online for churches - full gospel churches - and I plan to visit them as soon as we move down there. I don’t want to leave Paducah and forget all that I’ve known and stood for. I want my baby to grow up knowing who God is, what Jesus did for him and accept it with open arms. I promise, we are not moving to Ohio so that we can engage in sins of the flesh (which, honestly at one point, I thought that’s all that Ohio symbolized.) I know better now, especially since my husband has proved to me that it isn’t. 

My second priority is a baby doctor. I’ve called the only lady Ob/Gyn there is in Marion and is she doesn’t work out, I will look toward the others (there are 3 other male doctors). I want my baby to have a good start in life and this is one of those decisions I kind of have to make on my own because my husband won’t be the one delivering, obviously. I’m not going unprepared, I’m looking at every possible thing I can think of that will need to transferred, changed, shifted, released, what have you. I’m not just moving willy nilly. If anyone knows me, then they know I just don’t do that. I am a planner; I don’t like things to be done in a sporadic fashion and I won’t start now, just because we are moving to Ohio.

I know some people don’t understand. I, too, don’t really understand why a year ago, I was so against this and now, I have the desire to make this move, while pregnant, especially. I realize this is a giant decision, but we have made it and we feel peace about it.